I searched the error message I gave above, and ultimately I found that it is agreed in Cockroach dev team that this error was not supposed to be thrown that much and they agreed to remove it. However, since the fix did not went to beta releases of v19.1, team lead didn’t allow it to be released, and it postponed to v19.2. v19.2 is currently in alpha and will be released in 3 months.
I can’t wait for 3 months, I can’t update to v19.2 alpha, and I get lots of errors with this error reason. Then these requests are retried and most of them again get this error and hence retry. This makes my requests to DB more than what has to be, making everything slower. And really, my transactions are not that big and I believe it should not happen.
About the forum experience, because of great difference in timezones, when I postted a message, no moderator was around. When they come online and approve my message, I was not online. This makes this conversation over many days, slowing everything even more.
This is just a feedback for the Cockroach team.